It could have been me -By Maryam Ahmad

It could’ve been me
that was talking to my friend as we prepare for sleep in my hostel room. I will probably be chatting about how I can’t wait for holidays to come so I can go home to my parents. I certainly would want us to discuss plans of celebrating my birthday that’s coming up next month.

It could’ve been me
that was woken up a few hours later to the sight of gunmen ravaging my school. I will definitely be scared, I will certainly be shocked and probably confused as I am bundled up into the back of a truck, watching my school go up in flames.
It could’ve been me
thinking everything will be fine. That I should stay close to the rest of the girls, so that when rescue comes, I am not missed. I would think that 219 girls cannot just go missing without any trail. I will most likely be thinking that we will be rescued very soon, and this nightmare I am living will be over very soon.
It could’ve been me
exactly one month later, on the day of my birthday which I was hoping to celebrate with a few of my friends. It would have been fun. We had everything planned. I will most probably cry more today than I do on the other days as I am shouted at, battered and raped.
It could’ve been me
quietly loving my mum on mother’s day, thinking of my cousin’s on children’s day, praying a bit more on Christmas day, and hating my country on independence day.
It could’ve been me
365 days on. Shouting out loud without opening my mouth. Crying my eyes out without shedding a tear. It could have been me, hungry with no food, sick with no drugs, tired and exhausted without the option of a break. It could have been me Broken and resigned.
It could have been me, very broken and resigned.